Sunday Sanity: “Allow Humor To Lighten The Burden of Your Tender Heart”

“Allow humor to lighten the burden of your tender heart.”
Sunday Sanity on the propriety girl.com
With hurricanes + hurt + general humanity feeling particularly abundant these days it is important to remember the benefits of laughter on the soul, so that’s what I will be focusing on for this Sunday Sanity.

I know I get bogged down from time to time- some seasons more days than others. It’s hard not to be burdened by things going on in our personal lives and in the world. Being saddened by such things is not a crime, but rather the mark of a tender heart. A tender heart is something to be cherished. We should not be foolishly stoic in the midst of heartbreak and hurt. We are not called to be emotionally resistant, untouchable, or unaffected, but rather the opposite. We should have empathy, compassion, and a heart that is touched by burdens both our own and other’s.
But it is a fact that continually throughout the course of a tender hearted life, burdens can and will become overwhelming. When we become overwhelmed with the imperfection of life, one small thing can help us shift our gloomy focus: humor.
Using humor in the face of despairing circumstances allows us to shift the dismal thought process to a simpler one. Laughter allows us to accept the pain and still find a glimmer of joy.

Here is an example:
When I was 18 I had to wear a diaper to my prom because I had/have a chronic illness called Ulcerative Colitis that caused me to have a loss of control of my bowels. Embarrassing, right? Upsetting? Definitely. Wearing a diaper to prom is mainly just sad, honestly. It’s got very few benefits apart from the fact that it meant I could actually GO to prom and have a good time without worrying about what would happen if I didn’t get to the nearest restroom in time. But you know what got me through? Laughing at the fact that although wearing a diaper to prom was embarrassing, I was such a scrawny teen from being so sick the diaper actually made my dress fit better because I had no booty so that no one would even have guessed it was a diaper. My flat behind saved the day so that I could wear a diaper and weirdly feel slightly more confident about my slim figure. This probably isn’t that funny to a healthy person. It may just all sound sad. But dear friend, it wasn’t near as sad for me because I found a little humor in it!

The humor you find doesn’t have to be funny to everyone. It doesn’t have to be worthy of telling a crowd, it just has to brighten your circumstance and make you feel a little less hopeless.

Maybe you can’t find the humor in your situation. Maybe it’s hard to think outside the hurt. I’d encourage you to use your funny resources in these scenarios. When you think about it, you have so many funny resources all around you! That friend you always laugh with when you get together. That favorite tv show that hits with your funny bone. That Instagram video of a dancing pug (if you think I am kidding about this one you are in for a treat. Watch it here.)

Give yourself time to laugh. Not kidding, make TIME to laugh in your day. It can be brief, but schedule something intentional that will help lift your spirit in trying times. Laugh with hope that one day you will laugh without pain. Allow your burdened soul to find small humorous joys in every trial you encounter.

xoxo,

Libby

Sunday Sanity: How To Express Your Emotional Needs To Others

Sunday Sanity: Tell People What You Need on theproprietygirl.com

 

Happy Sunday Sanity Friends!
This week’s tip is going to help you express your emotions to others and get the response you need from them!

Have you ever been upset and tried to talk to a friend about it? Maybe you had a bad day needed to vent about your rough day to your roommates or significant other but upon telling them about your bad day they start telling you all the things you could have done to fix what went wrong. Not helpful, right? You wanted someone to listen and empathize with you, but instead got a list of too-little-too-late suggestions.

Now you’re only more frustrated and still feel alone in your pain. Bummer, right?

We’ll despair no more! Did you know that by simply communicating effectively you can essentially eliminate this scenario from your life?

The key is to tell people what you need from them in these moments of emotional release. Begin the conversation with a) the main point of what’s wrong and b) what you need from them. This may look something like “Hey, bff. I had a really bad day. Would you just mind listening to me  as I tell you about it? I all I need is to know that you’re here for me.” or maybe “Hey, husband. I’ve been really doubting my self-worth. I just need you to let me talk about how I’m feeling and remind me of my value.”

 

By doing this it forces you to emotionally reflect on your feelings and identify what you need. This is helpful for YOU because it causes you to do some self-assessment. Why did it upset you? How can you be comforted? How can the problem be resolved? This is helpful for OTHERS because it gives them a clear direction on HOW to comfort you WELL. The people who love you and are in your life, want to be helpful to you. Friends, husbands, mentors want to comfort, say the right thing, and be there in the moments of crisis so don’t feel embarrassed by genuinely and politely voicing what you need from them. It may feel awkward because you are being more direct and asking them to act in such a way, or do such a thing, but it actually is an insightful and surprisingly others-focused means of communicating. You are considering them by sparing them the mental game that is trying to figure out how to best respond to someone in crises. You take out the “oh shoot, they’re upset, and now I tried to fix their problem and they just got more upset/ now are mad at me” problem they may face.

So next time you are about to dump a truck full of emotions on those you love, pause and think “What response am I needing right now from them?” and then simply tell them!

 

**A note to the listeners: If you find yourself on the opposite end of this situation and you don’t know what to say to an upset friend/family member, ask them “What do you need from me?” Prompt them to be able to articulate what it is that they need. You are not expected to have the ability to always say the right thing or be the amazing person that turns their life around with that perfectly said word of advice! Most times we hardly know how to respond to a person in distress other than to just listen (which is in and of itself extremely helpful). Swallow that superhero, day saving desire and humbly ask what they need. I have been on the receiving end of this question and it was so comforting to be asked what I needed! Even if their reply is “Nothing” or “I don’t know” that is okay! That is your cue to listen and offer small words of comfort (i.e. “I’m so sorry.” “That is so painful.” “I understand your pain.” “You are not alone.” ) Know that your presence as a supportive figure is powerful even in silence in these times.

Pattern Mixing Fall Outfit

xoxo,

Libby

 

How to Make Easy + Delicious Homemade Flour Tortillas

I’m so excited to share this recipe for homemade flour tortillas with y’all today! It is incredibly easy and incredibly tasty, win-win! If y’all know me, you know that I’m no perfectionist. Well, I’m a selective perfectionist….and cooking is not one of the things that I choose to be type A about. What this means for you is that if I can make these tortillas YOU can DEFINITELY make them! Tortilla dough ball

This recipe was adapted from The Cafe Sucre Farine’s “Best Ever Homemade Flour Tortillas” and they truly are the best ever! My husband eats the entire stack in one night every time I make them….which honestly, thwarts all my attempts at making our food last, but it’s the price you pay for love, right?

Ingredients

3 cups flour – all-purpose 

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp salt

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1 cup warm water (apparently this is the KEY ingredient here- don’t ask me why but whatever it does, it does it well.)

Directions

Get out your mixer and attach the dough hook. Mix the dry ingredients together.

Next add the vegetable oil and warm water and turn that mixer up to medium!

Mix the dough until it forms a ball, making sure to get the extra on the sides so no precious future tortillas are wasted. *(If you don’t have a dough hook I feel like you could also hand mix the dough into a ball.)

Homemade Tortilla dough

 

Transfer the dough ball to a floured surface and separate into 14-16 balls. Using your hands, flatten each ball into a little chubby tortilla shape.

Let the chubby uncooked tortillas rest for 15 minutes.

How to make Homemade Tortillas

Once the 15 minutes are up, take your rolling pin and roll those chubby guys out into thin tortillas.

How to make homemade flour tortillas

Heat your skillet/pan up to high heat. Once the skillet is hot, place rolled out tortillas in the skillet. If your skillet is hot enough you will quickly see little bubbles begin to form on the top of the tortilla, once the bubbles begin to form, flip your tortilla. It will cook quickly so don’t wander too far off when frying your tortillas!

After about a minute, place the tortilla on a nearby plate with a paper towel. This will keep the tortillas from sticking to the bottom of the plate since they will be hot! Repeat this process for as many dough balls as you have and soon you will have a nice soft stack of homemade tortillas!

This delicious homemade tortilla recipe is so easy / theproprietygirl.com

You seriously can’t go wrong with this recipe-that’s how easy it is!

The key to cooking these tortillas is to keep the heat high enough to quickly cook the tortillas, but not so high that it burns them. I like to hover around 7 on my electric range!

Storage & Reheating Tortillas

Store in an air-tight container in the fridge to keep them fresh and soft! When reheating tortillas, place a damp paper towel over the tortillas and heat them for about 20 seconds in the microwave.

I hope these tortillas grace you and your family with soft, warm, tasty goodness! Enjoy!

xoxo,

Libby

 

Sunday Sanity: Yoga

 

Sunday Sanity: Yoga for Physical and Mental Health

Sunday Sanity on The Propriety Girl

Hi Friends!

Happy Sunday! How was telling yourself to “release that” last week? Did it work?? If you missed out on last week’s Sunday Sanity you can read about it here!

This week on Sunday Sanity I’m going to discuss the benefits of yoga for mental and physical health! I’m no yogi, but I have done yoga for a year or two now and have definitely felt the benefits of it! Yoga is great at relaxing and destressing after a long day! It also improves strength, aides in weight loss, increases flexibility, decreases pain, and can help manage anxiety. As with any good amount of exercise, you are going to feel the positive effects of endorphins which work wonders in boosting mood, inspiring confidence and reducing stress! Why not give it a try?

Yoga is a particularly great form of exercise because everyone can participate! Yoga is meant to meet each person where they are at. Meaning if you can’t lift ten pounds, run a mile, or do a pushup you can still do yoga! I am linking two easy helpful yoga sequences that can be done easily at home and require no equipment. These sequences are intended for beginners, but can be modified for or used as a warm-up for those seeking a more intense sequence.

20 Minute At Home Yoga For Complete Beginners (VIDEO)

Beginner Yoga Sequence to Reset Your Perspective On Life

Yoga With The Propriety Girl

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A note on yoga and the “spiritual” side:

Yoga is regarded by many hard core yogis as a way of life. Yoga, when taken in it’s full sense, is seen as a philosophy of becoming more aware of oneself and a melding of the mind and body. For the purpose of this post, I am not referring to yoga in that sense. I am merely referring to the exercise of yoga and the benefits thereof.

****If you are a Christian, I find it helpful and right to adapt your yoga practice to one that reflects your faith-based values. If you have seen or participated in yoga, you know that at the end of the practice the teacher may lead you in “om”. Om is often described as being one with the universe. It is a hindu and/or tibetan buddhist mantra that is kind of used as a prayer. (Someone correct me on specifics if I am wrong, I am not an expert but have learned from talking to people who practice yoga and prior research.) As a christian, I find it better to pray if “om” arises in a yoga class. Another good time for prayer is if you are instructed to “empty your mind”. This is a beautiful place to meditate on scripture. One of my favorite parts of my practice is when I am focusing on breathing and able to slowly let a flow of prayers stream through my mind, reminding myself of the truths of the gospel. This adds a particularly soul-enriching experience to yoga. The Lord has given us our bodies with the ability to work out. He has created endorphins to be released in us as a means of mental and physical encouragement. When we are working out, it is all the more amazing to be able to glorify God in the process, acknowledging the gift that working out, relaxing our mind, and testing our bodies is.

Additional Links (Links to legit, science backed studies)

Further Research on the Benefits of Yoga

 

As always, thank y’all so much for reading this little blog! I hope you enjoy trying out yoga this week!!

xoxo,

Libby

 

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